MC in Pisces: Just another man, on the lost highway

I'm a rolling stone,

all alone and lost.

What the hell does having one's MC in Pisces mean anyway? The answer seems to be just as confusing and elusive as the sign of Pisces itself. Maybe the reason why I find it hard to relate to this placement in my chart is precisely bc most of my energy seems to be so very un-Piscean - Sun in Sag, Moon Aqu, AC/DC in Gem/Sag, Mars in Libra... My activity is generally exerted with energies that directly conflict with or lack similarities with Piscean sentiment.

Though I find it hard to clearly interpret this placement, I do feel like it's representative of my career path. Ironically, I actually have a very specific, concrete desire for what I want to pursue: primatology, namely teaching and researching in this field. However, I have yet to get on a direct path to this goal. For years I've worked at another job, teaching in an unrelated field. Every few years I participate in a project within the field of primatology, but I haven't gained any traction. This past Fall I finally gave a decent go at applying to grad programs, but I have been declined by all but one program. Still waiting to hear on the last, but the alternative is more likely - getting into a much less desirable MA program through ITDS.

Having my Sun in the 6th house, I would've thought that my career path would be more stable and path-like. I feel like I've been drifting for years, though I know EXACTLY what I want to do. Perhaps having Uranus square my MC has heaped instability and disruptive influences on my already nebulous, foggy MC in Pisces. I often feel like a ship lost at sea.

So how do I deal with this contradictory influence in my chart? First I want to understand what this placement means, then see what strengths I can draw from positive (and even "negative") aspects. Pisces energy is all about connecting with the universe and surrendering your ego. Pisces is idealistic (like Sag), receptive, and empathetic. Planets in Pisces have difficulty taking direct action, so at least I only have an angle in this sign (can you tell that Pisces if my least favorite sign? Cap isn't far behind it). And it's ruled by a strongly dignified Jupiter in Sag conjunct my Sun. So while my Pisces MC is all about sacrifice and caring about others, it's invisibly connected to my ego and fulfillment (esp with Sun in the 6th house). I suppose the kind of work I'd be happy with would involve helping others, working towards a common goal with others, being of service, exploring ideas that apply in a broad sense. So far primatology seems to fit okay with this (even better if I could get more excited about primate conservation, though it's just not all that interesting to my Moon in Aqu just yet).

Having my Uranus squaring my MC is uncomfortable, but Kevin Burk (my favorite astrologist) always says that squares get you off your ass to do something about them. Uranus might also help me pursue unconventional paths or thoughts, which I think is something I'd need to keep in check so I don't wind up wasting to much time getting lost or running into dead ends. My Mercury in Cap is sextile my MC, which is sort of weakly helpful. At least it's not in conflict! My Venus in Scorpio (and in Detriment, how useful!) is trine my MC. Not sure how all this watery sentimentality is supposed to help me pursue primatology. I suppose Scorpio energy can help keep me focused and committed. Saturn in Scorpio has a wider orb trine that may lend some staying power to my efforts.

I still don't get how to bridge the gulf btw my masculine luminaries and my feminine/watery life path. Working at this teaching job may be the closest I've gotten so far - I have been able to take initiative with and general control of lesson plans and behavior mods, plus I have had employees that I could give direction to (I have mixed feelings about managing others - I like to teach, but not to "mange"). And yet overall, the theme has been for me to be of service, helping students to improve their reading and comprehension skills, helping to increase their confidence and self-esteem. It's really been the best of both sides. I just don't feel like this is my ultimate destination. I've been offered promotions twice now, but the next level involves much more marketing (I'd rather be poor!). I feel pulled towards something greater, involving more adventure and novelty. A career teaching and researching abroad is what I've wanted for nearly a decade now. Maybe I'll finally get there in the next decade.

Titi monkey chowing down on lluvia de oro!